Thursday, March 19, 2009

What We're Called. What it Means.

Dr. Dickhead -- the one who went to school for umpteen years to get those two fucking syllables before his name -- is/could be one of the professors I used to TA for. What he thinks is "generally liked by students" and receiving "high evaluations" are smoke screens to disguise that everyone thinks he is a giant, constipated asshole. People talk all kinds of shit about him behind his back, from my fellow TAs to the freshmen survey to my own advisor, and stunts like the one he is pulling with his name just underscore his douchebaggery -- he's outright delusional to think that he's being "friendly" and should count up the number of students who registered for his class this semester. He wouldn't even need fingers and toes; his own nuts could work, assuming he has a pair.

By the way, his "generous office hours" are void of students, which he neglects to mention, and he should be lucky to be addressed as anything at all resembling his given name, considering he's about to be known as Dr. I-Am-Never-Asked-To-Be-On-Anyone's-Committee-And-People-Aren't-Participating-In-Any-Extracurricular-Activities-I-Am-A-Part-Of-In-Order-To-Avoid-My-Dickheadedness. Similar to the tree falling in the forest ... can you really be a professor if nobody can stand to be around you long enough to call you anything at all?


Dear Herr Professor Dr. Corcoran, Ph.D.,

I'm glad you enjoy being called "Dr."--so do I. It is nice (sort of) when people over whom we have power show deference (or at least pretend) after we have demanded it. Ya know what's even nicer? When students (or anyone, for that matter) choose to show respect, not because of demands or degrees, but because they deem us respectable (a likely result of us treating them with respect). Calling out "Yeah, Studebaker?" doesn't show much respect. You don't have to lose face if students do not always show respect--just keep acting as if you (and they) are worthy of it. Because you are--and so are they.

But *demanding* respect is undignified. If you can't get it the hard way, then you can't get it at all. Imagine if the Dean demanded to be called "Dean Anus" rather than by his first name ("Tight", presumably)? No one (but for ol' Anus himself) would be fooled. The Dean should earn the respect of the faculty--either that, or just shut his mouth. The faculty should do the same with their students. Yes, even snowflakes.