Okay, I give.
I taught my very first college level class today, and I'm here to say that all the hyperbolic venting and shit-throwing on RYS is absolutely true. I prayed it was all just a ruse, just a smokescreen to keep the weak ass shits out of academe.
But it's not, at least not based on my first day.
I'm not a college romantic. I don't have the Dead Poets Society kinda vibe in me. I wasn't looking for applause or respect or love on that first day.
But, tell me, am I wrong, am I completely crazy, or are all of the freshman students complete fucking retards?
My mama didn't raise me this way; I shouldn't use that word. But nothing else fits? Brain-damaged? Is that it? Have they all been locked in a room that's been freshly painted?
These are things I was asked today in class:
- Are you a Mr. or Mrs.?
- What days do we get off for "spring" break?
- Do we have to take all of the mandatory tests?
- The syllabus says essays have to be typed. Where am I going to find a typewriter?
- Do you have a website with all of the test answers on it?
- How do I call you on the phone? Your phone number is ext (dot) 1123. Is that enough numbers?
- Can you spell your name on the board. The way it's on the syllabus must be a typo. There are too many "vulls."
- I heard that some classes have class parties on Fridays. Do we do that?
- If this class just meets Tuesday and Thursday what do I do on the other days?
There were some others, but I've blocked them out. It all went a little black there at the end. My head was spinning after about 30 minutes of class so I just let them all go.
Jesus on a Pony! What am I going to do? Do you know how long I spent getting ready for this day? Half of grad school is over and I know I'm fucked. This can't be what it's like. Am I being Punk'd?
