Thursday, September 25, 2008

Marion from Minot With Some Old School Smackdown.

Okay, I may regret this later, but I can't take another moment to think it through. My idiotic class has somehow gathered en masse to rate me on the other site that shall not be named. Fuck them. That's what I say. I've had NO ratings on there ever until this week, and it all stems from me reading the riot act to my class which had been misbehaving, shirking the workload, and making 9:00-10:20 AM Tues and Thurs a living hell.

So, darlings, try this on for size:

  • Umberto: You're a complete waste of plasma.

  • Hyppolita: Just looking at you starts to drain my brain cells.

  • Phyllum: You've only got one good strategy, saying whatever your buddy Weaver says.

  • Weaver: You're a four star dunce.

  • Cracker: I can smell the bull shit on your boots from 40 yards away.

  • Tonioni: You're a dirty bitch who smiles with one side of your face and sneers with the other.

  • Rapunzel: Ooooh, yes, you were a valedictorian at Shitballs High. Who cares? You have that vacant stare and then look #2, the "smile" that you must think makes me think you like me. Well, no, you're just a little phony, and I'm going to punish you with grades for as long as you're able to stay in the class.

  • Samson: I'd like to challenge you to a battle of Rock'm Sock'm Robots, and pop your block head right off.

  • Serena: That boyfriend of yours loves you for your car, honey, not your weave.

  • Kiki: We don't take smoke breaks in college.

  • Gerald: I don't need any advice from a 19 year old. And if I wanted advice from a dunce, well, I'd be a dunce, too.

  • Teo: If you could turn your FUCKING IPOD down, you might be able to hear the assignment the FIRST time I gave it.

  • Odoratum: I want to shrink your balls to the size of your brain, then we'd see how much of a bully you'd be.

  • Rex: I think chewing with your mouth open might be your only skill. Keep it up.

  • Warren: I don't give two shits how Mrs. Grandy treated you in Senior English. She apparently was wowed by comma splices and split infinitives. Me? Not so much.

  • Gallup: Yep, I can see that you're in a group of dunces. I don't know how I could reconfigure the class to make it work any other way.

  • *Anita*: Yes, you're pretty. Pretty fucking stupid. Pretty fucking vacuous. Pretty fucking much a waste of space. Could you please, please, please, wear the red outfit again, the one where your ass hangs out? I think the fellas really go for that one. Or did you notice, you sweet-sixteen-wanna-be minx on a stick?