Warning. I am a student. And being a student who reads this site, and is constantly irritated when a post from a student shows up, I should know better. But I've never been too good at that whole "learning" thing. I will promise you that nowhere in this e-mail will I say I'm the exception, that I'm "actually a good student, there ARE some of us out there you know" sniff, sniff.
Screw that. I'm a horrible student. Well, I have been. I have been that girl, the Suzy Sleeps-A-Lot or whatever other nickname you'd like to come up with. I am a senior undergrad at a big Midwestern university, and it took me until this year to finally take pride in my work and really attempt to be anything other than mediocre.
I am the girl who proudly stated "D's get degrees!" multiple times throughout my collegiate years. I told anyone who'd listen that I'd been named "Class Napper" my senior year in high school and was determined to keep up the title in college. I bragged about my professors who would let me sleep and then joke with me about my naps after I woke.
I have said time and time again that college is not for me, and that I'm only still a student because of my parents. I was completely fine managing C's and B's. I was known with my friends as the girl who would help to convince you to put down your homework and come out for a beer. If I could make it through on the minimum of requirements, so could they.
One of my professors this past semester was someone I'd had once before and had come to admire and respect. She has always been easy to get along with, but remains stubborn and incredibly tough when it comes to grading. I have always been confident that I'd get decent grades as long as I was buddy-buddy with my profs. But it didn't work with Dr. Mom.
She returned my first paper with comments I'd never seen before: "Suzy, I know you can do better than this. I'm very disappointed in you." Reality check. A professor actually paid attention to my previous writings? Who REMEMBERED my writings from another class? I felt like I'd been punched.
I suddenly found myself at the library, studying and reading MORE than what was required, making revision after revision of my next paper, determined to write something she and I would both be proud of. That's what really shocked me - I had never cared an ounce about what my professors thought of me. And yet here I was, focused, determined - and not just in this one class. In all of them. Dr. Mom had flipped a switch in my brain.
I stumbled across RYS only days ago but I love it. And I wanted to thanks all of you for putting up with little shits like me. And especially thanks to the ones who go beyond just putting up with us, but actually motivating us. This site has definitely given me some perspective, and I am going to try my hardest not to fall asleep in lectures anymore (no promises). It is said that parents with a particularly chaotic and irritating child will wish that the child will someday be a parent to someone just like them. If for some reason I find myself on the other side of the desk, I know I'm in for a hell of a ride. Props to you, professors. Vent away. God knows we deserve it.