Monday, November 26, 2007

See? People Love the Academic Haiku OR Short, Enigmatic Free Verse About Academic Matters, Occasionally Referencing Seasons, Nature, and Margaritas.

When we started the academic haiku feature last year, we never imagined the controversy, the alarm, the high drama of it all. Yes, we're familiar with what a haiku really is. No, we don't care. Academic haiku, at least here on RYS, are short-ish, somewhat enigmatic, focused on the academy, and usually a little silly or mean.

We've chosen some of the best and liveliest of the recent submissions, and present them below. Enjoy the flava, but don't miss earlier installments: Here, here, here, and here.


Leaves crunch underfoot.
Spanish moss sways in live oaks
Outside the window.

Still, we can not have
Lecture outdoors. Your whining
Face ruins my view.


Like the autumn leaves
your criticism tumbles --
Thanks, schmuck. What a putz.

Icy cold, your words
RYS exists to vent
"Real deal" or not -- ass.

Pale green, translucent
Leaves, like words, emerge fragile
Spring calls us to crab.

Bright summer sun shines
A beacon, RYS is!
Screw you, critic-boy.


"Hope you don't teach lit?"
Pretty funny, coming from
One who uses "ain't."


precious snowflakes come
summer's serenity gone
freshman infestation


In my office
The Monday before Thanksgiving –
Utter silence.

Stack of student papers
To grade over Thanksgiving.
Yeah, right. More wine?

I am thankful for
my students. No, really, I
need to pay the bills.

I look around and wonder.
Let me consider.
Publish or perish!
Rake in that grant cash, bitches!
Teaching gets short shrift.

Students wander in
Dead-eyed, dead-headed, lost.
"Do we have to read?"

Fuck it. The blender calls --
"Margaritas all around!"
Don't forget the salt.