Yeah, Same to You...The Final Post of 2006

I often read posts here with a little skepticism. The students seem too stupid, too conniving, too dramatic. The profs come off as too cranky and too despairing. But I always imagined that you at RYS were due a little hyperbolic license. But I had my own RYS-worthy experience here on the last day of the year.

I was lounging on a perfectly clear and sunny New Year's Eve Day, sipping rum drinks next to the swimming pool of my very rich brother-in-law a couple of days before having to head back to a snowy state and my tenure-track job that is only 10 days away.

I went inside to check my airline reservations and I made the tragic error of checking my school email. Here it is, my cautionary tale of the day:

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Dear Prof. Xxxxx:

I hope you're having a good vacation. I'm not. I just got my grade and I'm so disappointed. You know that I need an A to keep my good GPA, and I remember us talking about it. I did a very thorough job of getting ready for your final and I know I aced it. And I did turn in the extra credit report, although I was a few days late.

I enjoyed your class and thought I learned a lot this semester, but if this is the grade I got, then maybe I didn't learn as much as I thought. I don’t understand where I went so wrong. I am at a loss as to what else you thought I should have done. I might not have been in class as much as other students, but I had an off-campus job, I was in a play, and I did an internship for my major. So it's understandable how stressed I am.

I’m not trying to make excuses, but I really thought that I earned an A. Could you review all of my work in time for me to get new transcripts to show my advisor and my parents? By maybe next weekend?

Obviously my work was not what you wanted, but if it was that far off, I really wish you could have told me earlier. Anyway, I have to get ready for a big party with my friends. So Happy New Year.

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Oh, and when I pulled up my online grade book, the poor dear had gotten an A- in my class. So, Happy New Year to her and to everyone there at RYS.

An Adult Student Breaks It Down

I am a returning student. I love my classes, I love to study, and I cannot stand to make a bad grade - although it does happen. This is my second chance to do really well and it's making a difference.

I cannot imagine trying to teach students who are always late, make excuses about late assignments that were clearly explained, and are happy to pass with a "C." So I think it is very important teachers get to vent, hence this site. That said, let me defend rating teachers. A few of my teachers have been awesome, many very good, and a few just plain bad:

• Let my start with awesome. These are the teachers who let you know the expectations upfront. This may or may not be a hard class, but you deal with it and are prepared. If you are not willing to do what the teacher asks, then drop this class. Now! This will make it easier for you and me. Tell your students this!
• The good teacher. These are the teachers that allow some excuses but, in general are pretty fair. They expect assignments turned in on time, but do give leniency for some reasons. These teachers tend to be a little too easy going for me.
• The bad teacher. This is the teacher that has no respect for students. These teachers have a preconceived expectation that all students will be bad. This comes across in how the teacher talks to the students, deals with them as a class, and on a one-on-one basis. This is the teacher who is condescending, trying to make students look bad in class. The end result, none of the students has respect for the teacher.

I have had all of these teachers over the years, but I think that teaching is about the students and their education. Showing empathy, not sympathy, and working as well as you can with your students to make sure they get the education they are paying for, is the best way to deal with students!

If you are professor looking yourself up on ratemyprofessor.com, maybe you need to examine why you are!!

Live Blogging from the MLA in Philadelphia - ONLINE NOW

Hungover Horst, a German scholar at a small Liberal Arts College in the northeast, has sent us a flurry of emails this afternoon from in and around the main convention hotel in Philadelphia at this year's Modern Language Association convention, the biggest gathering of English and Foreign Language faculty in the country. We think Horst might need a big pill of some kind, or a mug of his favorite brew. But, we thought we'd share his ... uh ... er ... energy with all of you:

18:40 - Room
My colleague arrived and called me on the phone. Asked me what seminars I've attended. I flipped open the 40 pound convention guide and picked out one. That seemed to satisfy him. We're here to interview 9 applicants for our Spanish position. It starts tomorrow. As I was surfing the web on the lightning fast internet connection ($10 a day; thanks to my college for paying), my colleague nattered on about plans in the morning for a "conclave" with him and a grad school colleague who is also here. What my colleague doesn't know is that I have my own 10 am interview across town at the Embassy Suites. Pass.

17:12 - Sports Bar
Yeah, so I'm not attending any of the excellent presentations this evening on postmodern linguistics and its impact on teaching the 21st century dialectic. But here in the sports bar, it's just as enriching. Just a moment ago, a woman with tiny horned-rim glasses sent back a glass of some house pinot noir. It's a sports bar, honey. They have a giant box of wine back there and you're going to get another glass from the same freaking box. When it came back, she gave a big nod of her head and told her partner, "This is really good." Yeah.

16:10 - Lobby
You have to see the MLA to believe it. It's a yearly convention where thousands of faculty members from around the country gather to give and hear presentations and papers. Oh, that's what they say. But mostly it's a big job-fest. Almost everyone here is on the job market. There are a tremendous number of almost-minted PhDs who are looking for their first post someplace. But there's also a lot of mid-career folks - like myself - who are seeking a better job or a better school. Their departments don't know it, perhaps, but that's why they come. Oh, and for the light lager.

15:04 - The Bar
My colleague and I are back in the sports bar playing interactive trivia and drinking some Pennsylvania light lager. Is it a rule that every state has to make their own thin beer? Can't they just serve up Bud and Coors and whatever and leave the design of beverages alone?

14:45 - The Room
Okay, okay. So "Red" is off the shit-list. I got my room and it's palatial. I've spent nights in holding cells that are bigger. Ba-DUM-dum.

14:02 - Some Sports Bar
I don't even know the name of this place, but it looks like the last place in America where you can smoke. So I've got my American Spirits and I'm sucking them down along with some fried cheese that is so yummy that I'm thinking of sending some to the front desk for "Red."

13:51 - Philadelphia Marriott (lobby)
There are no rooms ready. I didn't call for an early check-in. What kind of a goon am I? Who'd ever want to check in before 4 pm? What kind of a crazy world am I living in that I might actually want to use my room for a bit in exchange for the $185 I'm paying for it. Hmmm, check-in is at 4 pm, but check-out is 11 am. So where do those 5 hours go? Do they ever come back to me? Do I get a rebate? Why wouldn't "Red" just cut me some slack and send me up to some primo suite that they hold in case Johnny Movie Star comes to town?

13:45 - Philadelphia Marriott (check-in)
My cab driver has left me. And we were having such a nice time. I'd rather drive around with him all day than get out into this mess of people. I hate the MLA. I hate the never-ending line of academic drones. Every one looks like they stepped out of that Sprockets sketch Mike Myers used to do on SNL. Black turtlenecks. Product in the hair. GOT TO HAVE MY PRODUCT. They suck. I'm tapping this while I'm standing in the check-in line, but a sweetie with red hair should be waving me forward any minute.

...and We All Ride Ponies to Work.

This is my first post here at RYS, and after reading through the rest of it, all I can say is, boy, do I have it good.

Yeah the pay sucks, and I have no job security or benefits, but what makes that tolerable is the fact that my students are great and it's not what I'm bringing to the class, it's what they are.

95% are serious about their schooling. They work their butts off. If they didn't, they'd fail. They're respectful, fun, profane, disagree with me all the time, eager, and they help each other out. The workload we thrust upon them is tremendous. I would find it crushing and that's an oft-heard comment made by my colleagues as well.

And here's something else - my colleagues and I like each other. They do their job and the students have acquired the knowledge they need to progress. My boss is even great. We fail students and kick them out of the program for low grades and attendance all the time. If students want to challenge a grade, they agree to a mediation, and their grade is raised or lowered without complaint.

If a student is having a problem, I usually don't have to set up a one-on-one session , they approach me, and most don't offer up excuses. They ask how they can improve their work and pointedly request that I not be soft with them.

I failed a student last term and he thanked me for it, saying he needed the kick in the pants, and he's come around completely.