Friday, November 06, 2009

Ruby from Richmond Rhapsodizes on the Dream Schedule.


What’s your dream teaching schedule?

The class meets one night a week. I'm an adjunct, but I'm paid something that makes it worth giving up my free evening--say, at least $8000 per section. In fact, I teach two sections of the same class, one right after the other, so I can double my income with very little effort, giving the same presentation twice in a row without having to leave the room.

The class is a lecture course. I don't have to jump-start inane discussions or worry about the social climate in the room; I just have to talk, and they have to listen.

And they enjoy listening. I'm talking about something important and relevant--say, vaccines--and they realize, listening to my presentation, that they've never really understood the topic until tonight. When I make a joke, they laugh, and when I tell them something grave, they look concerned. I change their lives, and thus the lives of others, and their faces tell me so.

No one sleeps in class. No one dares take out an iPod or a laptop, not out of fear, but out of basic respect and decency.

It takes me some time and some care to piece together my lectures, but once I've solidified them, I can use them over and over again (with slight updating) each new semester. Easy money.

There are no exams. There are no quizzes. There is no homework. Or, rather, there can be all of those things--but there are no grades. Everyone comes because the topic fascinates them, and even though I guess it'd have to be pass/fail, the latter is something that just doesn't happen.

If there's any work do be done outside the lectures, I have TAs, and they get paid nicely, too. They think of interesting supplemental material for my lectures, present it to the students, and don't involve me. All I do is show up, give my wonderful lecture, and leave. The Registrar's Office deals with attendance and add/drop issues before they even reach me. The technology in my lecture hall is mind-blowing.

Some students have questions for me after the lecture, and I'm glad to answer them. The questions are insightful and show that they've been paying attention and wrestling with the material. Someone brought brownies. They're delicious.

I can park next to the building for free.

About RYS:

Rate Your Students (RYS) is an academic blog moderated by a rotating group of college professors. To submit work for possible inclusion on the RYS blog, please submit text to our main mailing address.

Generally, stand alone pieces that are "lively" and focused on the terrifying life of a college proffie have the highest chance of making the page. Responses to earlier posts work well only when they come in within 24 hours of the original post. Otherwise the issue has often cooled.

There will usually be 2 site-wide questions each week, the so called "early thirsty" on Tuesday and the "big thirsty" on - well, Thursday. Generally, short and savage replies work best as we normally bundle a variety of responses in bullet format.

Due to the amount of mail we receive, it is impossible to reply to writers, even those whose work we use. This is a failing we would change if we could. Generally, if your post doesn't appear within the first week of you sending it, we've passed on it.

We also are happy to consider links and videos you think our readers might be interested in. We post links on an irregular schedule, but are currently posting 4-5 videos a week given the number of suggested pieces that come in.

We no longer entertain requests for press of any kind. The names of current and past moderators are not available. If you don't like the VidShizzles, please don't watch them. If you don't like the site, please don't read it. If you think we're clueless morons who've ruined the profession, then join the fucking club.